Sad πŸ˜”

So within the last week my anxiety has gone through the roof been signed off for 2 weeks but I think it’s gonna take longer to sort myself out. the docs have taken me off my anxiety meds and are giving me diazepam until I can start new medication which will hopefully be next week but I know it takes longer to get in your system.

It’s been a long time coming as looking back now I don’t think I have been well for at least 4 months as always my loyal pup 🐢 is constantly by my side checking I am ok licking me if I sleep for too long and generally just being my Guardian angel.

Life in general feels really shit at the mo with all the uncertainty at work to the constant grey depressing weather to even doing some house work I really need to try upping my game to get some sort of normality back in my life any suggestions would be greatly received!!😘😘😘



Sorry this post has been a week coming but it’s been a hellish week from finally a small Triumph to the feeling of being punched in the gut!!

Monday night at work l finally overcome the feeling my anxiety has been feeding for a while and realised that there was nothing I could do about it so stop worrying myself sick and go with the flow. For about 12 hours I was in the happy zone that I haven’t been in for ages.


Tuesday lunchtime my world gets a bit on a sucker punch in the form of my job title being axed and the uncertainty of what the future holds for my job and for my future work plans.

Do I step up to the mark and finally achieve something that has always been a dream of mine to be a manager that I know I can be or step down to do the regular job without putting that extra mile in whilst fighting the urge to do what I do best, helping out?

Monday blues 😒😒😒

Oh well it seems like blue Monday has lived up to it’s name today 😞😞feeling down I even had a mini panic attack earlier which I haven’t had in ages 😒😒

I don’t know about anyone else but I need the sun to start shining soon as this grey dull weather is proper getting me down haven’t done much today apart from sleep which I hate cause I have loads of things planned in my head but getting the head to communicate with the rest of my body is taking time to do.

If anyone knows of a way to do this pls drop me a comment as I need to snap out of it soon πŸ€”πŸ€”πŸ€”


So having got 6 days off work πŸ™ŒπŸ»πŸ™ŒπŸ»πŸ™ŒπŸ»it’s time to declutter the house having come into a bit of money I have decided I wanna change everything for the better so operation declutter has started old clothes, crap that I don’t need no more is either seeing the bottom of red or black sacks over the space of the next couple of months when time allows due to work.

On the subject of work I found out about the job I wasn’t a yes 😞BUT it wasn’t a no 😊 he is gonna advertise it again but this time he wants to see colleagues in action working with Customers and the team so gonna apply again as I know I can pass it thinking of the new bit just like a practical exam any one that’s worked with me knows I always put customers first.

I am very pleased with myself over the last couple of days my anxiety has felt a bit non-existence dunno wither it’s to do with treating myself or my tablets are finally kicking in and I ain’t so tired anymore I am definitely doing a lot more indoors. Have fun guys I will catch up with u tomorrow xx

Positive thoughts!!!

Hey guys and dolls sorry I haven’t updated in the last few days been busy in charge at work so at the mo my confidence is sky high as I have had 3 good days running my department without a manager πŸ‘ŒπŸ‘Œ all has gone well I also had a interview for a new position at work working on a department I love and feel I could make a massive difference not only in my work but in myself also it’s working on days so would be able to control my illnesses a lot better it will also reduce my stress levels πŸ™ŒπŸ»πŸ™ŒπŸ»

Now I can relax as I have about 6 days off and I have lots planned to do in that time like decorating my hallway. What do you guys think a bout grey is it to dull or should I go for a lighter type grey?? Answers on a postcard pls πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

So it’s time for me to hit the sack don’t worry I will let you know about the job as I will be so excited

Have fun guys and stay safe 😘😘😘

New beginnings

So yesterday was an experience that I hope I never have to go through again saying goodbye to my childhood home after 37 years stretch my anxiety thresholds to the limit 😒😒I know that it’s best for my mum but it hurts.

The best way forward is to think of the memories that are stored in my head as they will never disappear moving forward is the best option focusing on all the good things that can be achieved this year onwards and upwards πŸ™ŒπŸ»πŸ™ŒπŸ»